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A Tribute to The Mother Who Gave Life          

A Tribute to The Soldier Who Saved Life

The pregnant woman said “Sometimes loved ones hurt so much but unknown person lifts and gives hope. My husband left me when I was 4 months pregnant and I was going to be a single mother, I almost had lost hope to live, I was all alone. Thank you so much for everything Kavya!”

Ahhh! Kavya…An introvert. Her flashback isn’t vibrant, it’s a story of an Accidental Engineer whose peace was in coffee mugs, not in machines but when your dreams are designed by parents the reality becomes a dreadful dream. She wanted to start a Theme based Cafe but…….                                                                

Her colorful mind was ruled by machines and she too became a part of the rat race. 9-5 was not her thing but she wasn’t confident enough to live her dream. She was working in an IT company, living a robotic life. Well, everything was good till Covid-19 hit and she lost her job. She was upset obviously. It was completely locked down because of the pandemic, she was at home with her father. She was all alone as she never had friends and was unable to go out. She used to watch TV, play with the pet, and use social media. Time passed and her use of social media increased drastically. She would use social media to get rid of loneliness but slowly and gradually social media started consuming her. The posts on social media were depicting the perfect lives of people, at least on screen! The posts of friends chilling, the Mother-Daughter relationship, successful people, beautiful girls, and happy couples, etc. devastated her mind and induced an inferiority complex in her and she ended up feeling more alone. She watched herself in the mirror and asked herself, ” You look terrible, you are unsuccessful, you have no one, you are useless.  why you are even alive? Do you even exist between these beautiful and happy people?”

Well, this state of mind is called FOMO (Feeling of Missing Out) which is increasing in GenZ (Generation Z). Social Media sometimes shows us the half reality and we get skeptical about ourselves and question, “Why Don’t I fit in? “. Now at this point, Kavya was jobless, unsuccessful, and drowned in depression.

It was evening, Kavya was laying on the bed, scrolling down YouTube feeds and suddenly Monomam’s relaxing music video showed up. Music was the only thing with which she would feel connected.  She grabbed her headphones, tucked in her Android, played the video, closed her eyes, and started feeling the music. The guitar chords were trying to calm her down. An hour passed, she opened her eyes, and tapped the comment section and started reading the comments. Well, nothing in this world comforted her more than the comment section did. She found that she wasn’t alone, there were more like her, sad and depressed. Everyone came there to find peace in music. Music is the universal language, it heals. A comment stole her attention and she stopped by that comment and before she realized something her heart came out from her eyes.

The comment was “My wife passed away. It has bothered me since then that she didn’t say me a last goodbye when she knew she was dying. Today I am sitting at a drive-thru and listening to this music. I am sorry I couldn’t tell you how much I loved you for last time”An old mad had left that comment, the reason why this comment was special is, she too had lost her mother and she was able to feel the void. She had witnessed how her father survived without her mother. Her mother’s memories were being played in front of her like a movie. She cried her heart out that evening.                                         

 The next evening she again opened the same video and comment, this time she replied to the comment “The void can’t be filled, if my Mom was here I would have had a different story. Lucky those people who have their loved ones by their side. I miss my Mom“. She was overwhelmed, she felt the old man’s emotions. Days passed, a notification popped up on the screen of her phone. “Someone replied to your comment”. It was the same old man. “Dear one, Hope you are fine, May god give you the courage to fight back. We all are suffering but in different ways”. The voids in their lives created an unexpected connection between them. The informal conversation started in the comment section. The best part of comment section conversations is you are chatting with a stranger you haven’t seen before, you don’t know them but still, you feel comfortable talking to them because the person won’t judge you based on your past, appearance, or age. The bond created was pure and the speaking-listening communication is two-way. They both shared some special and sad moments of their life. After some days more strangers from different countries, different backgrounds, and different stories joined the conversation and shared their feelings. A comment created a small community of people who were alone, suffering, and finding some support. She felt more comfortable with those strangers and that undefined Bond was stronger. She felt loved. She realized that around the world, people are the same and so is the pain. She was happy because she finally found a perfect theme for the cafe.

A year passed, A catchy quote was on a board outside a cafe,

“If you feel lonely, meet another lonely soul. We all are one family”

The Café’s name was, “Hello Stranger!

It was Kavya’s cafe. The cafe was only meant for people who were suffering from Chronic Loneliness and wanted human interaction. She created a team of people who were ready to help, she included a professional counselor in her team to guide people because people know that they are suffering but still they won’t go to the hospital and take help, so she used to conduct sessions in her cafe. Different activities, loneliness-awareness campaigns were being conducted to achieve solitude from loneliness. Then she opened branches in different cities to reach out to everyone and her dream consoled many fallen souls who wanted to be heard, noticed, found, and loved…

Lonely soul is a desert; a community of lonely people is Utopia

Well, there is a difference between Solitude and Loneliness. In both cases a person is alone. In solitude, a person wants to be alone and is happy, solitude means peace of mind which is positive. In Loneliness, the person doesn’t want to be alone, the person is sad, and desperately wants human interaction. A big number of people are suffering from Loneliness so it’s like an epidemic now. According to a survey, 3 out of 5 Americans feel lonely, 63% Americans(Men) and 58%(Women) feel lonely. GenZ (Generation Z) people have the highest rate of loneliness. Countrywise Brazil, Turkey, and India have the highest rate of loneliness. According to National Sample Survey Office, 4.91 million people in India suffered Loneliness in 2017.

Several reasons are behind Loneliness and depression but the major one is social media. Social media serves a perfect life in front of us that makes us feel like we are not good enough. The severity of Loneliness is alarming. It leads to low self-esteem, anxiety, depression, and suicidal thoughts. A study says loneliness can kill you. The risk of heart attack is raised by 40% in the case of Loneliness and increases the chances of premature mortality by 50%. Loneliness is bad for Mental as well as physical health.

Solution? Being a helping hand and getting help. Loneliness is less discussed and more suffered problem. Medical help or counseling is always preferred. Some people will not come out to take help Or they are not good at talking so the one who can communicate should take the lead. People feel lonely because they are jobless or homeless or have lost loved ones or are orphans or anything… Reasons are endless and early treatment is needed. There are few organizations, where helpers and the needy don’t hesitate to take a step. One is Vandrevala Foundation. This foundation was awarded as a Best Mental Health Counselling at India Today Healthgiri Award 2021. According to WHO, 19 crore people in India had mental health in 2017.  This foundation works on Mental Health and helps or gives counseling through a Helpline that to for free. If someone is giving hand, we too should trust and take help. They say, ” We’re here for you, 24/7/365″.

All India Mental Health Helpline: 9999 666 555

The precious this in the world is the feeling when a stranger asks you

” Are You Okay? “

By: Shweta Lohar

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