The matchbreaker maker

“Mom! Have you seen my yellow socks? They are missing again!” Khushi exclaimed while going through the huge pile of socks on the unofficially designated “Laundry chair” in the room right across the laundry room. It was a small room with minimal furniture which consisted of a study table, two chairs and a bookshelf.  

“It must be there, Khushi. Look harder,” her mother replied.

“I’ve been searching for an hour now, Mom, and I still can’t find them,” Khushi replied. “Socks can’t grow a pair of legs and walk away, Khushi!” Her mother chuckled. “Fine, I’ll look for them in the morning. I am exhausted right now,” Khushi replied to her mother while giving me a deadly look as she headed towards her bedroom.

That was my cue that this night was going to be long! If looks could kill, I would be dead by now. I know I don’t have a load of experience, but I am trying my best. As the new member here, I dreaded a mess-up like this. Intuitively, I sensed that one mistake would come back to haunt me despite all my exceptional qualities. I am big, strong, convenient, and equipped with all the latest features while being pretty low maintenance. Man, I even got wheels, but they’re useless! I still cannot escape this dingy little place. What if I jumped out of the window? Oh no, my face planted on the dirty street with my body parts splattered all around doesn’t seem like a good idea!

I could… “play dead”. But my accelerated heartbeat would surely give my fraud away!

Okay, okay I need to calm myself. Think of something, think of something. I try to calm my breath while counting sheep. But wait! That’s for when you can’t fall asleep, right? What should I do? What should I do?

Should I whistle? Phuuuuuuuu. Aaahhh, phuuuuuuuu. Oh god, nothing is working!

Like a magic show, I stand here, stunned, watching the lights fade away as the door closes, and with the click of the lock, I know my inescapable fate is here!

For some reason, I got a strong urge to take a good look at my surroundings. The laundry room was a small place which was often lit by the sun rays during the day and moonlight during the night that entered through a small window. My user manual is sitting there on a forgotten dusty shelf and will remain there until I misfunction. Similarly, this laundry room sits quietly waiting for its opportunity to shine which occurs when the undeniable need to wash clothes emerges. Above me hangs an almost diffused bulb that has maybe flickered twice since my arrival. There are two overflowing baskets of dirty laundry sitting opposite my wheels. A couple of hangers and cloth pins are lying on dusty shelves beside my user manual. There are several boxes and packages of laundry detergents, a few bottles of comforters and some cleaning supplies lying around. Despite all the fragrant concoctions in boxes and bottles, the room smells musty and unwelcoming. The laundry room was quite opposite of the showroom where I resided previously. One could say the cool air-conditioned rooms, daily dusting and sweet fragrance of the room freshener had spoilt me.

Top of Form

The echoing footsteps, angry whispers and a strong whiff of monsoon mud-covered mucky feet and hatred getting closer to me caught my attention. The rage on their faces was enough to lighten the entire room. I knew the end was near! The memories of my short life from being in an air-conditioned showroom to being stored in this laundry room flashed in front of my eyes.

“STOP.” An old yet authoritative voice echoed in my ears, and at once the footsteps and whispers stopped. I opened my eyes and tried to normalize my breathing, but it was of no use. My heart was in my mouth, my ears were ringing and I was sweating profusely.

“What do you think of yourself you monster! Gulping down the members of our community? Because of you, many members of our community have been separated from their partners. Have some shame you fabric felon!” The voice sent chills down my spine.

“I… I am innocent” I whispered. I felt like I was transported into a courtroom, being charged for a terrible crime that I did not commit.

“Oh, come on, every criminal that gets caught says the same line!” he laughed at my face like a seasoned prosecutor.

“But I am telling the truth. I am just a washing machine” I almost sobbed.

“Oh, shut up! Just because I am a sock, doesn’t mean I will fabricate a story. I know your kind well. Even the last washing machine did the same that’s why we got rid of him” The old sock smirked.

“Um rid of him? How?” At this point, I was not even sure I was speaking coherently.

“We all lifted him and pushed him out of that window. He was so unrecognizable that even garbage was put to shame!” the old sock explained.

“Oh,” I gasped.

“Stop scaring the guy, you don’t even have any proof to back that up” a feminine voice hit my ears. Judging by the way she was bantering with the old sock I could say she was probably his wife.

“Dear, let me handle this situation, I am a man after all” The old sock retorted back.

“Ya, ya, a man who can’t even find his own sock” The lady shot back and earned a few giggles and cheers from the crowd. Yup, definitely his wife.

Ignoring all the cheers and laughter the old fellow glared at me, “Open your mouth you monster!”

I know I am innocent. But, as a new member here, I feel so alone, I am so scared to be here. And the things I have heard about the guy before me, have shaken me to my core. I know it’s not physically possible for them to do this but… what if it is true?

“Check each and every corner of him!” the old sock’s order pulled me out of my cycle of thought. My top load design was not an obstacle for the socks as they used my plastic wrapper to climb on top of me. They opened my lid and checked my detergent compartments, my pipes and every possible inch of me where they could squeeze in. Some of them pressed my buttons, others poked at my display. I could do nothing but stand still and wait for the investigation to be completed.

“Tell me how many of my members did this monster gulp” the old sock shouted. Like children in the playground, the socks came sliding off my plastic wrap and gathered around the old sock.

“Um… none,” a sock said.

“Not even a single thread.” another replied.

“What rubbish! Impossible. Check once again,” The old sock was visibly fuming now. His shrill voice went trembling down my spine.  

“They checked multiple times already. Leave the poor guy alone. Can’t you see how scared he is?” His wife replied. Her voice was like a lullaby to my ears.

“Don’t interfere. My judgment cannot be wrong. I am the oldest member of this community after all” the old sock stated.

“Oh, come on. Just admit that you socked up!” his wife was standing strong in my defence. She hugged me tight and this was the first time I experienced any kind of affection in this house. I couldn’t help but let out a tiny giggle as I felt a tingling sensation on my wheels.

“I did not sock up. He is a home wrecker and I will punish him for it,” The old sock snickered.

“Punishment… What kind of punishment?” I asked.

“You better not give him any absurd punishment or I will pull each and every stitch of your body,” his wife said while glaring at him. It was the first time I saw the old sock shiver.

“Your punishment is to find each and every missing member of my community and unite them with their respective partners before the crack of dawn” The old sock ordered.

“WHAT? Each and every pair? Are you out of your mind?” his wife began screaming at him.

“Hey, don’t interfere with my judgment,” the old sock replied,

“Judgment? Judgment? Are you even qualified to pass the judgment?” his wife glared at him,

The banter between them made my settings go from ‘delicate’ to ‘heavy-duty’ within seconds and before I could process it fully, I blurted out “I will do it”

For a moment it felt like the time froze. All the chatter, the banter between the husband and wife came to a halt at once.

“You sure?” the sweet old lady asked me breaking the ice.

“I know I am not the best matchmaker here, but I will try my best,” I put on my brave face and muttered as confidently as I could. Though the old lady did not seem confident, she gave me a small nod.

“Aha! I knew you were guilty. Stop your chitter-chatter and start working, your time starts now.” The old sock barked his order at me.

“Um yes,” I replied.

“Tick tock tick tock,” he mouthed and glared at me with utter hatred in his eyes. The pressure on me was pilling up like an overflowing dirty laundry. I could not think straight. What should I do? What should I do? Oh no, why can’t I think straight? Oh, wait! Straight yes! That was my eureka moment.

I cleared my throat and took a deep breath. This was the first time my eyes were taking in the entire scenario. Right in front of me stood the old sock and his wife. Behind them, as far as my vision could go, there were just socks. Some were short, some tall, some had different colours, and some had different patterns, they were all different, yet they had one thing in common, the rage on their faces.

I mustered all the courage I could and blurted out “Hey guys, I will help all of you find your lost pairs.”

“We’ll see about that huh!” One of the socks grumbled. “Boooooo Match breaker!” Another sock booed.

“Please form a straight line,” I requested with almost teary eyes.

The socks were about to protest my so-called leadership skill. But the old lady eyed them, and they obliged.

Despite their mumbling and grumbling, all of them got into a straight line.

I took a deep breath. Okay, look for similar colours and patterns and match them up, easy right? I looked from left to right and right to left, and soon enough I found my first pair! Yes! Finally, it was a pair of pink socks, both of them were so happy to meet each other, and honestly, that gave me a boost of energy instantly.

The next six pairs were a cakewalk; the colours to colours and patterns to patterns strategy was going quite well.

Until the patterns matched, but the colours didn’t, and colours matched, but the patterns didn’t. But I did not give up; I continued my quest to get all the pairs together. The next few pairs were difficult to unite, but not impossible. The sock community began being warm to me again, but this time it wasn’t rage, it was the warmth of affection.

Next, I called upon two black socks. But oh my, what a mistake. Turns out they were exes. One was tall, and the other was short, “I told you don’t dare show me your face,” shouted the short lady. “As if I am interested in seeing yours,” the tall guy shot back. “Silence!” Fortunately, the old sock came to my rescue this time. I looked carefully through the queue once again. But no luck. Then I scanned the laundry room, and under the laundry basket, I saw something black sticking out. “Guys, please lift the basket,” I instructed the newly united power couple, the pair of thick full-length woollen socks. And sure enough, two black socks, one tall and one short came out. They were dusty, sweaty, and sticky, but they were alright! “Oh, dear! It was so dark under there!” The short sock exclaimed. The short lady who was just furious a few seconds ago while facing her ex was all happy and excited to meet her partner. They hugged and sobbed happy tears together. On the other hand, the tall pair united with a smile and hi-fi! They weren’t keen on public display of their affection, but one could tell they were relieved to find each other. Wiping the happy tears from my eyes, I looked back up at the line in front of me. “Um, where is the line? All I see are two unmatched socks,” I said.

“Hey, brother! Only two of us are remaining,” The full-length white sock replied. “Yeah bro, all the others have found their partners,” The colourful ankle sock replied.

I began scanning the room once again to look for the lost socks, and I couldn’t stop myself from eyeing the happy couples in the room. But just then my eyes fell on the window. The darkness has begun to fade slowly. Now I only have a couple of minutes to finish my task. I began focusing on the lost socks again. “Hey guys, could you please move the detergent container for me?” I requested the power couple of the group again. They happily obliged. “Oh god! Where am I?” the voice came from behind the container. I peeked to get a better look at the source of the voice. Sure enough, it was a colourful ankle sock. “Oh, baby! You are here! I have been looking for you for so long,” The ankle sock ran running to his partner.

I looked at the lone white sock who was frowning. He looked like he was suffering from the classic case of “sole”-itude for a long time. “Hey man, don’t worry. I will find your pair soon, okay?” The sock nodded unenthusiastically. Seeing the sadness engulf him like that broke my heart. I began looking for the last sock. Hopefully, I will find it before the sun rises. With each passing second, my eyes were getting heavier. I have been awake for the entire night without a wink of sleep, and now the effects of sleeplessness are showing. Just as my body was about to give up, I saw a flash of white behind the curtains. “Behind the curtains!” I shouted as loud as I could. This time the power couple ran to work even before I could ask them. They successfully rescued the partner of the white sock. “Oh, my goodness, I can’t believe I found my sock-mate all over again,” the white no longer ‘lone’ sock said excitedly. “I am so happy to see you again honey!” his partner replied hugging him tight. I could surely see the white socks turning pink! Just as I was processing everything, the first rays of the sun gracefully landed on the white marble tiles of the room, eliminating the entire room.

I took a deep breath. Finally! Finally, I accomplished the task before sunrise. The old sock, his wife and all the happy couples appeared before me. “Well done my boy. It was a sock-cessful reunion indeed,” the old lady beamed at me. “Huh, don’t give him that much credit, don’t forget he is the one responsible for separating the socks from their partners in the first place” The old sock snickered,

“Don’t listen to him. He thinks he is the main character here. You did a great job in uniting all the couples before your deadline,” The old lady was still beaming at me “Thank you so much, ma’am, I wouldn’t have achieved my goal without support, cooperation and help from you, the power couple and all the other members of the community.” I expressed my heartfelt gratitude.

As the bedroom began to open, I gradually closed my eyes. I could finally rest now. “Oh wow! Mom was right! All the pairs of socks were right here,” Khushi exclaimed. “White socks, black socks, woollen socks, pink socks” I could hear her footsteps echoing in the room as she was going through the socks pile. I couldn’t help but flash a lazy smile with my eyes closed. I knew she would be happy, after all, I matched all the pairs. “Argh, I still can’t find my yellow socks!” she exclaimed. My eyes shot up. I could hear her hurried footsteps getting closer to me “Here is one yellow sock I guess,” Like a magician she pulled a bright yellow sock that had been hiding behind my back wheel. I could see ‘caution’ and ‘warning’ flashing in front of my eyes. I was wide awake once again. I looked at the old lady, she was no longer beaming with a smile. Instead, she had a heroic smirk on her face. I recalled the moment when she hugged me. The tingling sensation in my wheels was indeed this yellow sock. I felt betrayed! How could she? Before I could process the lint of betrayal, Khushi had left the room and once again the feeling of the hotness of rage engulfed me.

But this time, I was ready to face whatever these socks had to offer. The lack of sleep somehow boosted my energy. I eyed back at the old sock lady. “Yes, I am the monster! I have gulped many many socks. You fools thought you would scare me? Huh! I tricked you. All of you” I said with all the courage I had, sounding as intimidating as I could. I gave my best performance.

The old lady gasped, “He is lying!” she shouted.

“Hahaha! I am not!” I said spitting out a yellow thread that the sock left behind.

I could hear intense whispers rising in the back of the laundry room. The smirk from the old couple’s face vanished as if they had witnessed a ghost. I ripped off the plastic strips hanging on my body and stood tall in front of these socks, “I am here for the long run” I said as loud as I could. Though the affection from the old lady was fake, it helped me to come out of my protective shell. The rage that once engulfed me, dissolved like detergent powder in water.

By: Foram Hemantkumar Thorat

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