Father as the word suggests has its origin from the proto – indo European word (patēr) and an old English word (fader) meaning who begets a child, here the beget formal meaning in dictionary is to bring a child into existence by the process of reproduction but the true notion of father is not confined to the dictionary, it goes beyond that. For any individual the bonding with mother is undeniably linked with his father, the commemoration of father’s day has somewhat a similar story as this special day is interlinked with mother’s day celebrations as a heart warming story goes like this, once in a city near New York, there lived a young girl of 16 named Sonara Smart Drodd Whose mother(Ellen) kicked the bucket during the delivery of the sixth child. Aftermath her father a civil war veteran (William Jackson) never did a second marriage and brought up his children comprehensively. At a time when bringing up six children was an uphill battle , the way William bestowed mother’s love and the sacrifices was really a commendable job . Like the usual festive day when Sonara was present in the commemoration of Anna Jarvis’s mother’s day at Central Methodist Episcopal church , she thought of the sacrifices and mother’s love provided by her father for what he(William) must be acknowledged. she told her intentions to other church members to drum up support for her idea and as the western culture was open to new ideas, they devised a ministerial alliance and prepared their sermons on 19th of June {opposed to the proposed date of 5th June (her father’s birthday)by Drodd}citing it would give more time to prepare their sermons after mother’s day, after which Father’s day was celebrated for first time at the YMCA in Spokane, Washington on third Sunday of June in 1910, although it didn’t get much thrust in the initial days, it was U.S. President Woodrow Wilson who pitched in to gain this day more attention by unfurling a flag in Spokane, Washington DC but that move also got resisted by the Congress(US PARLIAMENT) Fearing that it would be commercialized just like the mother’s day benefiting only a small faction of men and trade groups, but with further steps taken by Presidents like Calvin Coolidge and Lyndon B Johnson the day turned into a national holiday by the then President Richard Nixon in 1972, getting into the list of the united nation observances.
As the observance of father’s day In the modern era came into early 20th century, a customary day for the celebration of fatherhood was in practices in Catholic Europe which dates back to at least early 1500s. It was usually celebrated on March 19 as the feast day of Saint Joseph , who is referred to as the fatherly Nourisher of the lord or purportedly known as father of JESUS.
The auspicious father’s day had came into existence through long debates and politicisation worldwide as attempt was made in 1908, by Grace Galden Clayton Who proposed the day to honour to those men who lost their lives in a mining accident in the US, but didn’t get any global attention . A bill to accord national recognition of father’s day was introduced in 1913 but got ruled out, in 1920s the promotion of celebration of father day also got halted when sonara went to study at the art institutes of Chicago, as she came in 1930s she begun raising awareness at national level endorsed by the father’s day council founded by New York men’s wears retailers, manufacturers of ties , tobacco pipes . It got lambasted during the early decades perceiving it as an attempt by merchants to replicate the commercial success of mother’s day , receiving sarcastic jokes and cynical attacks in newspapers. It has also been tried as a way of propaganda during the dark phase of Great depression and world war II when American advertisers started telling housewives that supporting father’s day was also a way to support their husbands at war and the war itself. It was finally Sonara’s and trade groups consistent initiative that by the mid-1980s we got this special day Which had become a second Christmas for all Men’s gift oriented industries.
Today father’s day is getting observed in more than 111 countries with much affection and endearment in the pursuit of honouring fatherhood .The day has not got any special date like the other honouring days as we have for Independence Day( 15th August )and Republic day (26th January),the date gets fluctuated every year .Of all the countries much of them have 3rd Sunday of June dedicated to father while some countries like Mozambique and Indonesia have another day shortlisted to honour fatherhood, every country has its own traditions and cultural history associated with the fatherhood and replenish their history in their own manner. In India father’s day is celebrated on 3rd Sunday of June.
In today’s world the definition of fatherhood has evolved with the changing time and advancing era from the one who was called Dada (one having the reign of the entire family and having the duty of the manual hard work )to Pitaji/Babuji (one has stepped outside the home to earn a living in town and cities, to be a financial support of the family)to Dad/daddy( one who has to go offices and have busy schedule) to Dude (one who used to be our friend) in today’s era.
In older times, fatherhood had always been looked through the one who has to trek outside, the sole bread earner of the family (financial support) and give love and protection to their entire family but with advancing time words like women empowerment, and an end to the patriarchal setup in which men and the father hold the primary power to predominate in social status and descent is reckoned through the male line have became the BUZZWORDS of today’s era, through which women in the family have taken an active role in handling the financial front due to which the notion of father had got transitioned in which the question of parenting have came at the front of fatherhood.
Parenting a child had been always associated with the mother, poems and writings are there upon mother sacrifices and love, and are often projected as the harbinger of a child, father had always been kept at the back foot but it’s not the case, even the parent word is not complete without the inclusion of father. Reports and surveys had been done in which it has been stated that men are more sensitive towards their child and have a major contribution in parenting tantamount to mother and in some even more than her. He’s someone through which a child tries to relate to the outside world and have the acknowledgement of a male of the World. The boldness and principals of moral values are being imparted by our father to us. Children are extremely sensitive and observant beings and internalize relational experiences through the prism of mother and father relationships which have lasting impact on them , on the cognitive skills and relationships with their counterparts and relatives.
A Father is the one who endeavours to bring up a child and build his/her child’s personality through the channels of discipline and strictness due to which, till the working age many children in our country have an undeniable sense of sweet terror from their father which, children after experiencing through all this find the significance of that sweet terror in building them up and their personality. There had been many articles and stories of father being the one whose car’s horns at the gate in the evening used to prompt children to sit at their study tables silently.
Of all the relationships, the relation of a father and daughter have got some special significance, every daughter as an exemplary bond with her father in terms of love ,care, attention and safety. Daughter always have a sense of securement whenever she is moving or dwelling beside her father which has got formed over long haul of years with love and affection. A daughter in his adult years tries to discover her father’s fatherhood qualities in her future partner. Daughter had always been the PAPA’S FAVOURITE in our homes.
With the changing trend there had been a severe decline in the attitude of today’s children due to which the respect and honour which we are having towards one’s father had degraded steeply. There is a drastic change in the mindset of today’s youth conceptualization of fatherhood, as now children used to desert their parents and switch to comfort zone leaving their parents with no any other opportunities than to wander around or dwell in old age homes, denting the image of relation the between the father and children. These practices disseminate a wrong message to the whole society which ultimately affects the new generation. The introduction of IVF(In-vitro fertility) to today’s world has also affected the traditional notion of father and has drastic effects on the present day culture.
May the acknowledgement of father would be done today as a good friend but that doesn’t mean to desert them at the time when they need our care and love the most. We must strive harder to reinvigorate the importance of father through newer era techniques and demands.
We used to update our WhatsApp status and Facebook stories stuffed with images and videos of fatherhood but it’s not that the, love for father should emanate only on just the father’s day, what about the remaining 364 days. We used to provide gifts and presents to father on this day but not the one like Michael Jordan who led Chicago Bulls to defeat phoenix suns in the 1993 NBA Finals What we call as the best ever gift dedicated to father or whether it be Sally Ride who in 1983 became the first woman to fly into a space abroad the challenger on the Eve of father’s day and the entire nation was buzzing about that feat. A Father had been at the helm of our support in the most challenging times as our permanent backup, as a tutor and sometimes even as a human horse to make us feel elated, now it’s our responsibility to honour and care every deserving father to uphold the sanctity of fatherhood and father’s day.
Anyone can father a child , but being a dad takes lifetime.
By Ravi Ranjan, Haryana
