I am a really happy person but sometimes I am really confused about the unfairness of situations, situations where no one understands what you actually feel or want… sadly not even parents. Although, yes the widely accepted belief is that parents know everything, they have given ‘birth’ to the child and it is IMPOSSIBLE that they are unaware of what they desire. However this is not true, parents definitely love us the most and are the closest relation we have with anyone in this world but do they really understand if we say, ‘I am insecure about my face’ or ‘hey I like someone’?
The most common responses to these statements are, in the first case, ‘stop it, whom do you want to look pretty for?’ and in the second case, ‘Focus on your studies, we are paying for that not for these stupid things’ or if the parents are extra ‘nice’ they will say ‘OH MY GOD what!! How can you say such things? You are disrespecting your family name!’ Whereas the only thing the child would want to hear at the moment would be, ‘Oh well I actually think you look beautiful but yes we can discuss what specifically makes you insecure about your face’ and in the latter situation, ‘Oh it is normal to have a crush on someone, but I think before taking anything serious, both of us can gave a friendly discussion about this and the important things in your life at the moment that need your attention’. Now, a difference in the tone and words used would make the child feel the value and importance he or she has for the parents, but parents usually never say this.
Now the question is why parents never sympathize with their children in these situations? The answer is they do not know how to. Weird right? you must be thinking, how is this possible?… overall they are P.A.R.E.N.T.S. Yes they are parents but most of the time they behave with us in a manner that the society thinks what ‘good parents’ do or in a way their parents behaved with them when they were children.
Most of the time, parents want to have a good reputation in their society or on social media with the award of being ‘the best parents’ but they forget they are parents of their children and the needs of their children comes first. At other times, parents think that it is best to do with their children what their parents did to them. So they continue the legacy, and respond to their children the way they were responded to by their parents who were responded in that way by THEIR parents. This is the reason why children always say to parents ‘you will never understand’ because they know they are going to hear lifetime lessons and be scolded about how they are wasting their life when so much ‘money is spent’ on them.
By: Maria Batool
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